The five commandments of Halloween costumes

The race is on to either buy or design the best Halloween costume you possibly can. Boys often opt for monsters or superheroes, while girls tend to prefer princesses, angels, etc. For adults, however, Halloween costumes represent a completely liberating opportunity to be someone you aren’t with society’s full approval. Since this happy time only comes around once per year, make sure your selections stick to these five commandments of Halloween costumes. If they do, you and everyone around you will be better off at the end of the month.

1. Thou shalt not damage household items for costumes.

Given that we’re from Indianapolis on the Cheap, we admire you for choosing to use your own materials rather than purchase expensive one-time use items. That said, damaging your household items for costumes tends to be a bad idea. As an example, consider the old cut-eyeholes-in-sheets-to-make-a-ghost trick. This idea has so many problems, it’s hard to know where to begin. This costume is overdone, meaning it won’t be terribly scary. It’s hard to walk in, and ending your Halloween night with a sprained ankle bites worse than a trick-or-treat bag full of only Toblerone. If your sheets happen to be white, you could be confused for a member of the KKK. Finally, once you cut eye holes in those sheets, they won’t work well as sheets anymore.

 

2. Thou shalt not wear clothing inappropriate for the weather.

We’ve heard it before – it’s warm right now as I’m buying this costume. October is a month of transitions, and we can still get away with wearing short sleeves. Murphy’s Law always strikes by October 31, however. The weather never cooperates with Halloween costumes, and you will be miserable if you spend much time outdoors in the cold autumnal night wearing a costume that exposes your upper thighs and midriff. Plus, we aren’t even going to comment on the family-friendly factor in your neighborhood.

 

3. Thou shalt not just wear your own clothes.

If this is your plan, go back and read our introductory paragraph again. Seriously, go read it. We’ll wait. Okay, now to summarize: If you want to dress up as something crazy, this is the one time of year you can do it without anyone reporting you to the police. We know Ebenezer Scrooge is more affiliated with Christmas, but dressing up as yourself on Halloween is a move only he would sponsor. Plus, it shows a complete lack of creativity.

 

4. Thou shalt not risk expensive items.

This rule is kind of the corollary to Rule #3. Go to a little bit more effort than just dressing as yourself, but don’t blow Halloween costumes out of proportion by wearing expensive items that you need to take care of. For example, don’t wear your wedding dress out for Halloween. Don’t wear real jewelry  you could lose in someone’s bowl of candy. If you’re going out as a creepy CEO, don’t actually wear the same suit and tie that a real CEO would wear. This one is almost more like common sense, but we wanted to make sure we had five commandments.

 

5. Thou shalt not make the dog (or other pet) look stupid.

We understand  you love your pup. We aren’t even telling you to completely leave them out of the Halloween fun. If your dog loves attention, taking him with you on your Halloween excursions could be fun. However, keep your pet’s feelings in mind when you decide to deck him out in an elaborate costume. Fido doesn’t care if you think he looks awesome in a prison inmate jumpsuit. He’s just going to try to eat said jumpsuit and pout for the rest of the evening.

 

If you have been reviewing your Halloween costumes and found them to be in violation of our five commandments, don’t panic. We encourage you to read our national site’s 85 cheap and easy costumes post for alternative ideas.